I was having a conversation with a client last week about her weight loss goal. This client -- let's call her Amy --  has lost 20 pounds over this last year and wants to lose those "last five pounds" in a month, just in time for a beach vacation. 

First, I'd like to point out: Amy has CLEARLY demonstrated that she can put in the work, both with exercise and nutrition, to lose weight safely and I have no doubt she can reach her goal. Girl's got skills! So why not say, "More power to you, let's do this!"?

Here's Thing One: Like me, Amy enjoys yummy food and an occasional cocktail and summer in Chicago is full of those.

Here's Thing Two: Like I said, it's summer. We're out of hibernation, being more social and therefore presented with more opportunities to accept (or decline) the offer of the aforementioned food and cocktails. And after this LONG winter we had, I personally don't want to limit my frolicking time being out and about.

Here is Thing Three (and the most important): I want Amy to set herself up for success. Success being getting to her goal feeling happy and whole, NOT feeling deprived and frustrated. You know what happens when people's diet/lifestyle regimen leave them feeling deprived and frustrated? Weight gain boomerang/depression/feeling isolated and miserable. WHO WANTS THAT?

So my first question to her was: What are you willing to do to lose just over one pound a week for the next month? 

As Gary John Bishop explains in his book, Unf*k Yourself (I highly recommend the audiobook), we often lament about what we don't have, who we aren't. One example he uses is "Why aren't I rich?" His answer, posed as a series of questions, went something like this:
"Are you willing to put in the work it takes to make it to become the next [insert name of a millionaire here]?"
"Are you willing to miss major holidays with loved ones to make the extra money?"
"Are you willing to put the most important relationships in your life aside to put work first?"
"Are you willing to never have a vacation without emails and phone calls for an extended period of your life?"

Obviously for some people the answer to those questions is "yes" and that's awesome! Just as awesome as it is for people to say "no" because then it is an active and informed choice. 

When it comes to fitness and aesthetic goals, we are very good at stating what we want and lamenting what we aren't. We want to lose the last five pounds; we want six-pack abs; we want to run a marathon. 

What we're not so great at is asking ourselves what we're willing to do to reach those goals.

Here are some questions I asked Amy regarding her goal of losing five pounds in a month:
"Are you willing to cut back on portion sizes during all of your meals?"
"Are you willing to feel hungry for 30-60 minutes before each meal?"
"Are you willing to cut out all snacks out for the next 4 weeks?"
"Are you willing to keep alcohol consumption to maybe 1 drink per week or 1 dessert per week?"
"Are you willing to put in 4-5 workouts per week, 2 with me and 2-3 on your own?"
Like I said before, this girl's got skills. I know she CAN do all of the above. But is she WILLING.

I don't know what her decision is yet and that's frankly neither here nor there as far as this story is concerned. The point is, we often set goals for ourselves that make us feel like losers when we don't reach them. And that's sad because it doesn't have to be that way.

I want to leave you with four ways to set a goal and reach it:
1. Write down your goal and by when you'd like to reach it.
2. Break the goal down into multiple actionable steps (ex. to lose 1 lb per week I need to cut out/burn 3500 calories; to do that I will need to do x, y, z and a, b, c).
3. Put the steps into a timeline.
4. Assess your timeline and actionable steps. Can you execute your plan while still feeling happy and whole? Yes? Great! No? Can you make the goal more realistic? (ex. lose the last 5 pounds in 2 months or lose 3 pounds in one month) Can you make the actionable steps more appealing and doable? (ex. I can happily limit my summer rosé intake to 3 glasses per week rather than 1 glass per week) 

Friends: Rethinking your goals and what you're willing to do to reach them (also known as taking a good, hard look at your values) does NOT make you a failure. It makes you a rockstar who might be finally freed of the shoulds and coulds and the why-am-I-nots. 

(Usually) we don't reach our goals because we don't do all that we should have done to get there in the timeline we gave ourselves.

(Usually) that happens because we don't know how to break down the goal and make a plan and timeline.

And we don't know what we don't know until we know it! So take the steps above and run with them! Set yourself up for the win! Be the rockstar you are ON YOUR TERMS.

​Or, as Gary John Bishop bluntly says, unf*k yourself. ​

Have something to say? Please leave a comment below!
Want to chat about how IzzyFit can help? Shoot me an email at izzy@izzyfit.com or call 312-497-8999!

​1. Laundry and dry cleaning: The first time I learned you could get your laundry done for you was from friends in NYC. What CAN’T you have done for you in New York? You can get your dirty laundry picked up and dropped off all neatly folded and ready for you to put back in your drawers and closet the very next day? Well, luckily that sort of thing isn't just for mega cities like New York! Services like Rinse and Laundry Day in the Chicago area have apps so all you have to do is hit a few buttons and voilà! It’s like magic (and can cost less than $15/week, says Laundry Day).

5. Grocery shopping: Some of us can grocery shop like ninjas (I like to think I’m one of them, creating my shopping list in the order that I’ll find the items at the store…Oh, boy…). But there were times I was using services like Peapod and Instacart because my then-job was so demanding I felt like my time was best used working than wasting time at the store. I have zero regrets. Another plus to getting groceries delivered, beyond time being saved: Sticking to your list! As my friend Jen reminded me the other day, using a delivery service might actually SAVE you money (and calories) if you tend to wander away from your list. ​

6. Yard work: Some people LOVE pulling weeds, mowing the lawn and raking leaves but if you are not one of these people and you don’t want to commit to a regular landscaping service, you can use a company like Lawn Love. Just like so many new companies (some of which I’ve just mentioned above), you can download an app on your phone, get a quick quote and order a service to be rendered at a scheduled time. (Lawn Love also does snow removal and gutter cleaning, among other things.) ​

1. Fun shirts. My client Caroline is the QUEEN of fun training shirts. They can help you feel sassy, awake, fun and ready to take on the weights. A few great places to try: Chinup Apparel, LookHuman.com, Active Apparel. ​

A few months ago I wrote a piece about how to avoid stress-induced heart attack during election season. So I think it’s logical that I do a follow up this week and make a few tweaks to the tactics I listed.
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I’ve been noticing that all around me things are a little “off”. People are snippy and agitated; tired and unable to focus. Drivers are driving like jerks. I know I live in a major city but people seem to be making even less eye contact with each other on the street. We’re in a collective fog.

It’s been a whirlwind week with nonstop STUFF from the inauguration to the Women’s March to newsfeeds we can't keep up with. No matter what side you’re on, you’re likely experiencing Breaking News-itis, an overdose of all sorts of media, a strain in some friend and family relationships if you’re talking about current events, and likely some kind of reaction over the unknown. 
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Now, obviously I’m not a mental health professional, I’m not a doctor (and if you’re really battling some stuff, you can find help here). But I do know that chronic stress and anxiety will not help your body feel good at all. So while we figure out a way to be good, productive members of society, let’s work on how to be good, productive AND healthy (because, let’s face it: If you’re not feeling good, how productive can you really be?).

Here are some ways we can combat the negative effects of What’s Happening RightNowAllTheTime:
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1. Set your limits. How much time have you been spending in front of the news and your Facebook feed? How much do your friends, family members, coworkers talk about politics day to day? A lot? I thought so. Here are a few ways to combat your exposure:

• Turn it down a notch. Instead of getting some form of the news throughout the day, try subtracting your viewing/listening/reading by a half hour. Still too much? Knock off more time until you’ve found your sweet spot. 
• Set a conversation timer. Want to talk about current events but find that it's ALL you're talking to your loved ones about? Set a timer so you can get it all out and then move on to another topic. You can always go back but make sure you're also talking about OTHER parts of your life that matter.

2. Create a relaxing pre-bedtime ritual. Is your brain filled with STUFF that makes it hard to fall asleep? Stop drifting off in front of the TV or going to bed right after watching/reading stress-inducing crazy-pantsiness. Take 30 minutes to wind down and shut your brain off. Here are a few ways you can do this:

• Turn off all electronics that have screens at least 30 minutes before bed. I think we all know by now that the blue light can mess with your sleep but it can also screw up your hunger signals. Put the screens away.
• Play some relaxing music while you take the day off like your contacts and makeup, while you floss and brush your teeth.
• Spend some time cuddling with your pets if you have any (did you know cat purrs have tremendous health benefits??). Or watch cat videos...
• Crawl into bed to a good non-work book. Try to read for 20 minutes or so.

4. Find non-food or drink-related “rewards” or “comforts”. Feel yourself reaching for the cookie far or liquor cabinet? Take a pause and ask yourself what you're really looking for. It's likely to feel warm and fuzzy. In other words: Reassured and comforted. Here are some other ideas:

• Get a mani and/or pedi and/or massage.
• Call your best friend and talk and catch up (texting doesn't count).
• Hug your people a little tighter.
• Take a hot bath for 20 minutes. (Y'all know how much I love Epsom salt baths, right?)

5. Meditate right after waking up or right before bed. If you feel like you don’t have time, try waking up or going to bed 5 minutes earlier to make the time. Start with 5 minutes and work from there. Sometimes 5 minutes is enough. And there are apps for that!
6. Shut it down. If Facebook or Instagram are making you ultra stressed out these days, take a break. You can get your news elsewhere without all of the highly-charged editorials. Shut it down. If you can’t bear the thought of unplugging, here are a few things you can do:

• Limit the amount of times you check your feeds. Again, there are apps for that.
• Unfollow the friends who post the most stomach-dropping news clips/memes/rants on social media for a while. It's OK. They won't know.

7. Last but not least: Exercise. We all know breaking a sweat can do wonders for our state of mind and overall well-being. Plus, if you're doing something that takes a lot of concentration (kettlebell training, moving heavy weight), you HAVE to clear your mind for a little while. So find something you love to do, be it lifting weights, spinning, running, kickboxing, yoga. Just try to do something a few times a week that leaves your body feeling really good and your mind clear. And if I can help you figure out what that is, please give me a call (312-497-8999).I am in no way saying that ignorance is bliss. It’s quite the opposite. Stay informed. Do your part. Just make sure you're not putting YOU on the back burner in the process. 

As a girl who a few months ago knew nothing much about the Cubs except that I know where Wrigley Field is, I’ve been incredibly inspired by their modern story. The more I learn about the most “cursed” team in baseball, the more I realize that you can make direct parallels about how they went from the Lovable Losers to World Series contenders to how individuals can reach their fitness and weight loss goals. In both cases, they’re stories about seeking out advice, guidance and coaching; gradually collecting more and more wins between losses; and about believing in consistency and staying the course to ultimately reach the end goal and sustain it. 

The Ricketts family bought the Cubs from the Tribune company in 2009. As soon as the Rickettses took over, the Cubs started losing more and more games over the years. But the family had crafted a solid, multi-year plan. They met with some of the smartest individuals in the baseball world to learn what steps they needed to take to build their dream team: Who were the best people to fill in their management and leadership positions? Who should they draft onto the team? Who should they trade and who needs to go? Eventually, the Ricketts family decided to create a super young team recruited from the farm system. They brought on Theo Epstein to be president of baseball operations and then, when he was available, Joe Maddon as manager. Eventually, to cap it all off, the Cubs brought on star pitcher Jon Lester. And from the Losable Losers they bought in 2009, the Cubs are currently in the World Series in 2016. These steps were not accidental. They were rigorously plotted out, a plan was set and all the players in the game knew what to do.

So what do the Cubs have to do with reaching our goals?
EVERYTHING. Here’s what I mean:

1. The Ricketts family took the time to meet with experts to formulate and invest in a winning plan. Choosing to make a big, personal life change like losing weight or training for a marathon is a big deal! And, yes, you can read up on what to do via the internet or by books but I would stress the importance of making sure your source is credible. Check credentials, get multiple opinions, choose what aligns with your values. If you do that, you create your own winning plan. (Side note: The Rickettses bought the team for $845 million in 2009; the team was worth $2 billion by 2014. Think they treated their 2009 team as an investment? You betcha.)
2. They stayed away from Shiny Object Syndrome. The Cubs recruited a core group of athletes from the minor leagues. This means they trusted that young players with zero major league experience had the grit to eventually make it to the World Series. Yes, they brought on veteran pitcher Jon Lester, but he was an anomaly. With weight loss and strength training, it’s so easy to gravitate to a Shiny Object that promises fast results like a juice cleanse or Paleo to radically cut carbs or to join CrossFit because your neighbor did it and lost 120 lbs and looks like an Adonis but can’t raise his arms overhead anymore. But here’s a question: Does it work for everyone? Could it work for you? Long term? Or is there a plan that might work for YOU that lines up with your values that you can follow for the time it takes you to reach your goals and beyond, even when things aren't going your way?
3. Practice, practice, practice. I use the word “GRIT” very purposefully. How do young Cubs hopefuls get from the farm to the Big Leagues? By practicing. Did they love every bit of their training? Do you think their awesomeness blossomed linearly? Nope. And there was nothing linear about the modern Cubs’ growth either. In 2012 — 3 years post-acquisition — the Cubs lost 101 games, their worst season since 1966. When we decide we want to lose x amount of lbs, it doesn’t just “happen”, right? We need to take action. We (and by “we” I’m now talking about my own clients and myself) choose specific habits and skills to work on. And just like you don’t win a World Series overnight, you don’t lose the weight and keep if off overnight, either. You hone your nutrition and fitness skills over time, you collect all of the wins you can and learn from the losses. You understand that, in order to be a champion, you need to put in the time, one game at a time.
4. They’ve stayed the course. Ok: So I LOVELOVELOVE my nutrition program, CleanSlate28. But when I tell potential coaching clients that the program is all about developing skills and habits to lose weight and keep it off over time, and that there are guidelines but no hard and fast rules, that they don’t need to eliminate gluten/dairy/soy/corn/fun/taste/life to reach their goals, I lose people’s interest really fast. A lot of people want an immediate answer to solve their “problem”. They want things to happen NOW and I can’t blame them! If you’ve ever told friends/loved ones/acquaintances that you’re working out and making better food choices, how many times have people given you uninvited advice? (“You should do Bikram CrossFit!” “Have you tried drinking wheatgrass shots in a headstand? I lost all of the baby weight in 5 days that way.” There’s always a critic.) But, time and time again, the people who are able to reach their goals and then stay there have been able to make their lifestyle changes ones that they’re personally happy with, that they can make a full life with. The Ricketts family had a plan they were happy with, that they believed in. They were heavily criticized by everyone under the sun and it was at times emotionally draining. But they stayed the course. And they got to the World Series in the time they predicted: about 6 years from their year of purchase. Pretty cool!
5. One of manager Joe Maddon’s many Yoda/Dan John-like philosophies is, “Don’t let the pressure exceed the pleasure.” I’ve learned to coach clients to declare a new habit/skill by filling in the blanks with this sentence, “I am 90-100% confident I can ___________ when I _________.” For example, “I am 90-100% confident I can drink 24oz of water while I get ready for work in the morning.” But what’s usually missing is the word “happily”. If a CleanSlate28 client says, “I am 90-100% confident I will eat zero added sugar at any time of the day, seven days a week,” I will ask them to rephrase the statement with the word “happily”. 9 times out of 10 it changes entirely and the client has a huge AHA moment. Happily? We deserve that? YES. Because if you’re going to experience long-lasting success, shouldn’t you be able to do that WHOLEHEARTEDLY?

It may be a very long time until I talk about major league sports again. But I couldn’t let this go. The Cubs’ modern story seems so other-worldly but when you break it down, it could be any one of our own.

​And with that, I will leave you with two words: GO CUBS! ​

I ***HATED*** PE throughout school. Instead of going to PE, I did my best to find a way to go to the nurse’s office because of a headache/cramps/hangnail/somemadeupreason (and once I actually DID fall down the stairs on my way to the nurse in high school — fell hard… Karma). I managed to miss every single swim class we had in high school because I wasn’t comfortable in a bathing suit and hate being under water; the mile test was the WORST day of the year because I ran about a 12-minute mile while the kids that smoked a pack of cigarettes a day could somehow run it in 6; rugby was the only sport I contributed any points to because, since you pass the ball back vs forwards, no one ever realized I had the ball. ​

But then, in 11th grade, a new world of PE classes became available to take for credit. I could choose from such classes as Rock Climbing, Adventure Learning, Lifeguard Training, Sea Kayaking, Fitness Training, Yoga and — my two personal favorites — Dance and Stretching & Relaxation. I took those two favorite classes junior year and then somehow I managed to talk my teacher into letting me co-teach those classes senior year. I didn’t know it then but that was my introduction to coaching (so thank you, Ms Simpkin, for that). And the great thing was: It taught me that I didn’t need to hate exercise.
Here the thing: In traditional PE classes, you don’t get much of a choice when it comes to what exercise is. We all kind of learn that the important things to know are how to run a mile and that the more sit-ups and pushups you can do in a minute the better, and that it really sucks being picked last on a team. (And it’s really embarrassing when you fall on top of your PE teacher during the tumbling class in front of everyone…)

Why do I bring this up? Because too often I hear people say, “I don’t like exercising but I know I need to.” 

Sound familiar? If so, you might have experienced the dread I felt in PE classes. You might not have been in an environment that made you feel like you were a part of a community of peers made up of different fitness levels that could work together; you were probably not in a place where you believe you could excel and feel competent even if you weren’t “good” at first; or in a place that even gave you a choice to do certain sports over others. 

So why on earth would we put ourselves in a position to relive the dread of high school PE in adulthood? When a potential client contacts me, I know that they might have been thinking about contacting someone for a long time. Taking the step to finally make that contact is brave, it takes guts, it puts them in a vulnerable position and I absolutely do not take that for granted because I know that client put herself/himself in that position because they need HELP. 

If you’ve read this far, thank you because I’m finally getting to the point. You or someone you know, reading this now, might be in the “I hate working out but know I have to” position. What I want to ask you is:

1. What about working out do you hate? (And if you say, “Everything,” I’ll challenge you to be more specific.)
2. You’ve determined the WHATs; now determine the WHYs. Why do you hate those points you just wrote down?
3. Who says you have to work out by doing the things in #1? Your doctor? Your partner? Your friends? Your HS PE teacher?
4. Are there any ways you LIKE moving your body? Is there anything that feels good, either during the activity and/or after? Yoga? Dancing? Walking? Kickboxing?
5. Once you’ve determined ways you like to move, see if there are any classes or coaches in your area that offer those options! (Action steps below)

Listen: It’s 2016 and almost anything is an exercise class now so I feel confident there’s something out there for you. It might be Zumba or Bollywood dancing; it might be martial arts, tap dancing or training for strong(wo)man competitions; it might be aerial arts or pole dancing (not at all kidding); it could be hoola-hooping (also not kidding) or tennis. It might even be strength training with me or any of my colleagues at TruFit, wink wink!

Here are a few ways to find options that might be right for you:
Class Pass
The MindBody App 
Yelp
Your local park district (if you have one)
Your local YMCA
MeetUp
Me! If you’re looking for something and can’t find it, email me! I’ll do my best to find what you’re looking for.
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Here is the bottom line: There really is something for everyone. Disliking pushups or running a mile doesn’t make you suck (Usain Bolt has never run a mile; he doesn’t suck). You’re just on the verge of finding what might lead you to a more full, happy and healthy life! So get after it!

Wearing a bathing suit in public: It sends chills down my back. In fact, I gravitate to big-city get-aways so I don’t even have to take my bathing suit out of its drawer. But yesterday, I did it. I put on my big girl pants (or in this case, a bikini), marched into the pool area at Soho House (because big cities have bodies of water, too), and decided I’d have a wonderful day at the pool if it killed me. I’m honestly not sure this could have happened had I not attended the Motivate Summit here in Chicago a few months ago. Let me explain.

During a breakout session at the Summit, a group of fitness pros was talking about how we coach our clients to re-write the script that runs in a loop in their heads. Scripts like, “I look fat” or “I wish I looked like that” or “What will so-and-so think if I do such-and-such?” Coach Stevo, CEO of Habitry who puts on the Motivate Summit, mentioned that his fiancé Kat had a great trick when it came to crappy self-talk like this. She will let herself think the negative thought (instead of just trying to repress it) and then will immediately follow it up by asking, “But what if I didn’t care?”

What if I didn’t care? 

Those five words put together into a question: Those could be some of the most powerful in your life. They’ve begun to sink in with me and it’s been a serious game-changer.

“I will feel so gross in my bathing suit and people will totally judge me,” was the script looping around in my head as I weighed the pros and cons about going poolside. 

“But what if I didn’t care?” I rebutted. Really, though. I made myself answer that question. If I didn’t care, here’s what might happen:

• I might actually get TO the pool area. 
• I might even get INTO the pool and cool off between replying to emails and reading.
• I might get into the pool, cool off, and realize that it’s really, really FUN.
• I might pay much less attention to other people who I thought might initially judge me. And then I might realize that if they DO judge me, it has more to do with them than me.
• I might then wonder, hey, what kinds of bodies of water have I been staying away from all of this time??

What if I didn’t care? Simply put, if I didn’t care, I might be able to live a little more whole-heartedly (hat tip to Brene Brown). And, wow. That's pretty freeing. 

(SIDE NOTE: Had I not gone to the pool that day, I wouldn't have run into an old friend who I'd gone to high school with in Hong Kong, who also happened to be my freshman roommate at Northwestern, who moved to Italy right after graduation, whom I had not seen since 2002!! WHAT?! All because I jumped off the deep end and wore a bikini!)
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So: What if, next time you caught yourself saying something not-nice to yourself, you asked the question, "But what if I didn't care?"...

This post was originally in my newsletter but seemed to speak to so many people that I decided to put it up on the blog! You know, because I want more people to know about my gut-busting bikini battle ;) I hope this might have helped you, too! Feel free to leave a comment if this has ever had a positive impact on YOU! (And if you'd like to receive my weekly newsletter, you can totally sign up here!)
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